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behoove_me
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Posted on 10-31-12 1:55
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Anne,
I read and re read your post and was amazed at how well it was written -brief, precise and equally humorous as compared to relentless harangues from people like me.
Besides the brevity and underlying humor, I was also surprised at how well you controlled the flow of your story; there was not a single piece of redundant word I could come across.
The sentences like –
I regretted making that joke even before I started, but he laughed anyways
And
I knew the basics of bar lingo that guys used by now, so I bet he would have yelled the same thing if Nickelback was playing.
marks how profound your observation and perception are and how cleverly and concisely you put them in words.
Hathaway talks to herself in movies, but barely writes a story. I felt like I was reading someone who has the likes of Virginia Woolf, Jhumpa Lahiri and E.L. James combined.
Kudos!
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HairyBicep.
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Posted on 11-02-12 7:16
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Seriously? A featured post?
Good one annehathaway.
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annehathaway
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Posted on 11-03-12 3:50
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I read some of behoove_me and bhakunde bhut’s stories word by word this morning. As inspiring and flawless as they are, they also make your pieces look like a fourteen year old’s random musings. I instantly hit writer’s block (thanks to them lol), but then struggled out of it to finish the second part anyways. I hope you all will like it.
Dates
This is purely an art of fiction. Resemblance to any person, living or dead, is a mere co-incidence.
I went through all of Aditya’s thirty-three profile pictures for the seventh time. Nepali men leave you displeased even when you are stalking them. After perusing Stephen’s page for about five minutes, I could have easily written a four page paper on his ex-girlfriend. His timeline displayed everything there was to know about their relationship – their trip to Cancun, their thanksgiving dinner with a tofurkey (a part of me puked a little) and her weird desire to make a duck-face every time they posed in front of a camera. I knew nothing about Aditya’s love life (or the lack, thereof) though– no pictures, wall posts, or anything else with the slightest hint of a female presence in his life. The picture of him touching John Harvard’s statue with a bunch of other guys who were all wearing shades and Nepali North Face jackets wasn't much of a help.
(God, if Zuckerberg ever put the Linkedin-style "Who has viewed your profile" option on Facebook, I bet all of us would be twice more productive.)
My phone lit up after I turned my pillow to get to the “cool side” for the fifth time. “Hey girl, its all you tonight! I’m with James”. Kathy was in bed with the ginger from the club. Not to sound like a prude, but three shots and one daddy issue later, Kathy would sleep with anything with a penis. James was ugly – like real ugly – like imagine if Sarah Jessica Parker and Charlie Sheen smoked crack, had a baby, and threw the baby down a flight of stairs. That baby would look exactly like James. Well, I’ll let her enjoy her 20s I thought – when she finds her overall wearing, tobacco chewing, rifle shooting, truck riding soul mate, she will be in it for the long haul (or that’s what I hope at least).
Stephen did text me that night, but more on that later. Not that anything happened between us; I backed off although the ball was in my court. Being in a relationship in college is like taking a 400 level class – you spend hours trying to make it work and stay sane, and sometimes, you don’t even get credit for it in the end.
As I poured some hot water into my oatmeal the next morning, I thought more of Aditya. After our first “date”, we had a few more encounters.
“Hi, I am thinking about you…”, he texted me about three days after our date at Tantra.
“Oh! Really?”, I responded, unable to decipher the three periods that followed his feelings.
“Aaja k gardaichau? Hami Jay Nepal ma film herna jadai chau, your friends are also coming. Timi aune bhaye I’ll pick you up!”
I walked into my dad’s room and grabbed a copy of Annapurna Post to check out the movie listings. The idea of a romantic date shattered completely as I read “Om Shanti Om”. Sawariya was playing in the same theatre, but I was sure my friends would take a mindless Bollywood flick with Sharukh Khan over a great and meaningful cinematic experience any day.
“ Pardaina, ma taxi ma auchu, Anju sanga”, I replied.
Have you ever walked into a room full of people and felt like they are all watching you? Well, that’s how I felt when I walked into the theatre. My dad’s side of the family consisted of avid Bollywood movie-goers and chances that one of my “uncles” was in the theatre was pretty high.
As they giggled and whispered to each other, my friends strategically placed Aditya and I next to each other.
I have immeasurable patience for bad movies. But Om Shanti Om begged for a whole different kind of extraordinary endurance to be able to sit through it. As if the tasteless movie that treated women like expendable doormats while men were reduced to tongue-wagging womanizers wasn’t bad enough, Aditya awkwardly placed his hand over mine about three minutes into the second half. (Strike one) “That’s your first move, dude?”, I thought. I complied again, although I felt nothing.
I awkwardly pulled my hand back four minutes later after I couldn’t take his sweaty palms anymore.
“Yo naya heroine is very sexy hai?”, he leaned over to my ears to make himself heard amidst the deafening music. (Strike 2). He was trying to be funny, but you don’t ask me out on a date and then describe your increased hormonal levels in response to a scantily clad girl on screen!
He leaned over a couple more times to crack a few jokes. He had the sense of humor of a twenty-year-old virgin, and even his charming eighteen-year-old smile didn’t make up for it. The sixth time he leaned over, he tried to steal a kiss on my cheeks. I pushed him away, and gave him the death glare that only my elder brother had seen until then when he totaled my scooty. (Strike 3). I excused myself, grabbed my purse, and left the theatre. This time around, I had averted two disasters – the other one being Shahrukh Khan.
Aditya had to go, and I made that very clear after the four texts that I sent him that evening. The eighteen-year old me who had never been in a relationship thought I should’ve given him a chance, but the hopeless romantic in me begged to differ.
Three years later, I kissed a guy for the first time. It was not until then that I fully comprehended that kisses aren’t supposed to be forced. When you are in it, every fiber of your being is in it, and as he leans towards you, the act is mindless.
And what better place to kiss a guy than the top of Cooper Mountain as both of you are ready to ski down the trail. The crisp air, the warmth of companionship……..more on that later.
To be Continued….
Last edited: 03-Nov-12 04:29 PM
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ThahaChaena
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Posted on 11-03-12 7:59
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very well knitted second part ANNE...... Humorous yet striking depth in your writing..... loved it..... waiting for another one....
BTW khai kaslai ho timi sanga lop paryo bhaneko thread dekheko thiye .... hai maile.... ... ani thane re ?? yo story bhanda pahila ta kahi kura bhaachaina baa .... thane bhanera kasari chinya ? .... kuro gairo cha .... side ma pahiro cha... bolaune bhaye mayaa le bolau natra thaney bahiro cha.... hehe
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JayD
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Posted on 11-03-12 8:21
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Nice read . "......... James was ugly – like real ugly – like imagine if Sarah Jessica Parker and Charlie Sheen smoked crack, had a baby, and threw the baby down a flight of stairs.",n thats the jimmy kimmel type of humour , I felt.
when it snows so damn much that you cannot get out in sat evening n u come across the writing like this,,,I guess anbody will take it. I totally enjoyed it .
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Karnali Blues
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Posted on 11-03-12 11:34
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Great, as humorous as the first one. enjoyed a lot.
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serial
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Posted on 11-05-12 3:04
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Very interesting n humorous - Good going
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Rinzi
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Posted on 11-06-12 11:18
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halo
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Posted on 11-06-12 12:40
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Grace_S
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Posted on 11-07-12 2:04
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Interesting; anticipating more to come and that too soon! ; )
-Grace
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Nepal ko chora
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Posted on 11-07-12 11:48
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A beautifully narrated piece so far!! Looking forward to reading more....
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durbarmargnepal
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Posted on 11-08-12 11:52
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Two thumbs up!
Last edited: 08-Nov-12 11:53 AM
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annehathaway
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Posted on 11-08-12 12:00
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Thank you all!!
I started this off as a random blabber about a fictious night out. However, after responses from you guys, I was enthused to write more. I have to apologize for the abrupt ending though. I have always written for myself, and pronlonging the end till later would have made me write things I didn't believe in. I even thought of leaving the story as it is, but after some words of encouragement (thanks behoove and lynx), I decided to end it.
I don't mention Stephen anywhere in this story. That is because I feel like our chapter calls for a story of its own (which I promise is on its way). I will also write many more stories, no matter where I am. You know what they say, you can take the girl out of sajha, but you can't take sajha out of the girl.
Dates - Part III
This is purely an art of fiction. Resemblance to any person, living or dead, is a mere co-incidence.
The best part about your first kiss are the moments that lead to it. All of a sudden you think of everything – the things you like about him, your first date, the first time he held your hands…Unfortunately for me, I was busy thinking of the pastrami soup I had earlier in the day and if he would taste the garlic. Dorky, I know, but that’s how I am. And I didn’t know the protocol! Us Nepali youngsters don’t get the sex talk (or whatever it is called) from our parents. My knowledge of kisses was limited to a Bollywood couple getting real close and the screen zooming into two flowers touching each other (well ok, that’s an exaggeration)
I doubt it was Aashish’s first kiss though. He looked like the one who would have had a couple girlfriends in high school.
I met Aashish at a family function a couple years ago. He looked like any other Nepali guy – a loose fitting tee, blue jeans, gelled and spiked hair. However, there is something sexy about a guy who reads Butler for fun (or maybe that’s just me). We talked about lipstick feminism, gender as a spectrum, and several other issues that would bore a normal human being to death. After we couldn’t take the weird gazes from middle-aged women in the room anymore, we parted, but only after exchanging msn ids (don’t be judging, msn chat was “in” those days).
“Aashish_cobain had added you to his friend list” popped on my screen later that night. I chuckled, wondering why people felt the need to add eerie names on their msn accounts. I swear, I had at least ten princess_insertfirstnamehere and cool_insertfirstnamehere on my friend list alone. Somehow, my name.surname looked sophomoric in that crowd.
Aashish and I talked a lot that month. By the end of it, I knew everything about him – from his guilty pleasures about Legally Blonde to his “grunge phase” in middle school. His facebook pictures then made it seem like he hadn’t showered for days, but he proudly claimed that it was his “just out of bed” look. (Word of advice guys, any sane girl will NOT dig that hairdo).
Some great soul in sajha once told me to keep my endings concise. So I will cut to the chase.
English movies reiterate the idea of love and wedding into your head so often that sometimes you forget your roots. You imagine a guy on his knees, reciting poetic verses, handing you a diamond ring. I was lost in one of those fantasies too, but luckily for me, the reality was close, pretty close.
Aashish proposed to me by the waters behind the government center in downtown Boston. Earlier that day, I got a text from him that was probably the best text I’ve received in my life (Well, Tyra Banks texting me that I was selected for ANTM was pretty close, jk jk)
“Hey hun! Dinner at Hard Rock tonight?”, not exactly the ideal location for an anniversary dinner, but that’s where we had our first official date. I had proceeded to spill the margarita all over my blouse after having one drink too many and he had walked me home.
“Sure, babe!”, I responded, as I grabbed my things to head out.
The dinner was normal; we talked about each other’s days and complained about the case of Mondays. That was a good end to a Monday though; what more could a girl ask for –flowers, and a guy with the sense of humor analogous to Colbert.
Dinners at Hard Rock always concluded with us walking down to the benches by the water and smoking cigarettes. Since this night was no different (well, until later), we did the same.
“Hey want to watch what’s on the other end?”, Ashish asked me as he dropped quarters into the telli ( I know they aren’t telescopes, but we called them so).
“Sure!”, I responded, partly weirded out by his desire to peek at things when it was pitch black.
After trying really hard to figure out what shapes different stars made, I gave up and turned around to grab a seat. There he was, exactly like I had imagined (slightly better actually), with a ring in his hands.
Obviously, I said yes.
The rest, as they say, is history.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Wrapping up your annehathaway saga, eh?” Aashish asked me as I was posting this on sajha.
“Lol I wish, I just started! I have many more stories to tell!”
“So, tell me, do guys hit on you out there?”, he was only half-kidding.
“Haha, not at all, babe! And you should know that I’m all yours!”, I winked at him.
“So you say!”
The End
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sherlock
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Posted on 11-08-12 12:35
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Loved the ending. The story about Stephen and 'you' has created an unprecendented expectation, a big one!
Can't wait for it.
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halo
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Posted on 11-08-12 1:08
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Karnali Blues
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Posted on 11-09-12 9:04
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Great story, fabulous writing and sweet and cute writer "hopefully!! wink wink" and lastly the best reader like us. What else I need to make my weekend. It wad a great read anne, thanks for the wonderful piece. Hope to see some more in future.
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ThahaChaena
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Posted on 11-09-12 9:30
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Very nice endding ...or shall I say beginning .... Good read ANNE ... You Passed with high colors(yestai bhanchan kyaara ) as a SAJHA WRITER....YAY ...
Timi lai lekhna protsahan diney lai ta fanakka ghumera dhyangryaanga pachariyera khuttama samatera dhanyabaad nai dinu parcha baa......
" Some great soul in sajha once told me to keep my endings concise." ....haina yo sajha ko bhoot ko raicha.... yesto bhattakti aatma lai bhetebhane janya cha maile.....aba soul bhanya aatma ta ho kyaara ni... tehi aatma lai bhoot ni bhanchan kyaare.... yesto ramro lekhney lai ending concise gar bhandiyera....
Hopes are high ANNE... waiting for more of your writing
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28th amendment
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Posted on 11-09-12 7:54
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i knew babbal khate was a faggot!! ANI babbal khate bro, will you tell your cornholer boyfriend i said hi!
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sherlock
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Posted on 11-09-12 11:35
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ThahaChaena
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Posted on 11-10-12 12:25
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Ko ho babal khate feri ????? babal khate BRO pani re wos ko boy friend pani re.... yeh 28se..... arkai thread ma lekhna laako yaha lekhiyo ki keho 28se bro...
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wonton
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Posted on 11-14-12 12:23
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Annehathaway great job with the simplicity in which you narrated your story. Loved the ending. Looking forward to more.
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